Rainy Days...

It's been raining here all day! Boo! I've been feeling really down this week. Not sure why. Could be the impending arrival of my monthly visitor. It seems to be happening every month..

We've been inside all day, I watched a couple of odd movies on the movie channel and just lounged. I probably should have went to the gym, but instead I ate a bunch of leftover spaghetti. I think I needed it. To be lazy that is. I love being a SAHM, but sometimes I just want to escape..just for an hour! I don't ever get time alone, unless Bailey is napping so I took advantage of it today.

Anyway, I learned to crochet recently...thanks to YouTube! I made Bailey a hat. It's been a good way to curb my nighttime snacking while I'm watching TV. The hat turned out really good, and I think I'm going to line the inside with fleece to keep her little head a bit warmer in the winter. Now I'm making 3 more for a friend back home. She has 3 girls who will look so cute in them!

Anyway, just wanted to share the hat! Enjoy!

Just some pics to share..

Bailey's first take at "real" food. Something other than baby food. She loved the spaghetti!

Jesse fishing in the pond in our backyard. He loves loves fishing...such a boy!

Jesse and his friend Caden at the pool. Popsicle break!

This one is my favorite. She loves to make this face now. She's too cute.

Little by Little..

My waist line is whittling! A little at a time, but I'm really starting to notice a change! It's such a great feeling....to finally get this baby weight off. The jeans I was wearing when I found out I was preggers.................are just about.....TOO BIG!

Tonight I'm taking ZUMBA (www.zumba.com) at the gym. I love it so much!! It could be my love for dance...not sure, but it is by far the funnest workout I've done yet. The hour just flies by in no time.

I bought a healthy cookbook that has all sorts of good recipes in it. Last night I made Creamy Ranch Pork Chops. I can have pork, beef, or lamb one night a week, so last night was it. They were SOO GOOD. You'd think that it would be really bad. I'll have to post the recipe for it. I paired it with some rice, and green beans. Perfect dinner.

I lost almost 4 pounds this week. I was aiming for 5, but hey I tried! I did have a few slip ups, mini chips ahoy cookies got the best of me! 5 more to go and I am going to get my hair done I think. Maybe I should wait until 10. It's a good motivator for me.

I bought a Shark Steam Mop yesterday. It is the best mop I've ever used. Since Bailey is crawling, I'm mopping everyday (hardwood flooring). I love this thing, because it uses only water and it dries almost instantly. I dont' have to wait for the floor cleaner to dry before Bailey can play. My floor is so clean! Granted, it isn't shiny like I waxed it..it is fresh and nice. I'll never buy another mop or bottle of floor cleaner again! Well, until I need to wax the floors anyway. It came with 5 resuable pads that I can just throw into the washer. Now I sound like an infomercial.

I'll end it with this...Jesse was eating carrots with Ranch for his after school snack the other day, and he looks at me and says: " Mommy, why isn't Ranch good for me? IT IS made from PURE vegetables." He was so serious, it was funny. So I explained to him, ranch tastes good on your vegetables but doesn't have veggies in it! HaHa..Kids are so funny sometimes.

They grow up so fast!

Lately, I've been noticing a big change in Jesse. He's growing into that tween stage as they call it. He acts so grown up sometimes it's scary! I finally started giving him a chore list, and he's happily doing it earning himself 5 dollars a week. Teaching him the value of money has been fun. So now when we go to the store, and he says, "can I have that?" I say, well sure if you want to spend your own money. It makes him think twice about what it is that he wants. He's currently saving up for a new game, although I think that will probably change within a week or so.

On another note, I've only managed to work out once this week. I'm not sure what happened to this week but it has been crazy busy! I wanted to go to Zumba class last night, but we met Jesse's teacher instead. She's seems to be real nice! It helped Jesse get excited about going back to school. He always complains that he hates school, and it's because he's bored. At the young age of 7 and going into 2nd grade, Jesse sits at almost a 4th grade reading level, same with math too. I just hope his teacher challenges him and keeps him busy. I know his last teacher didn't, and we finally figured out the cause of his acting out and getting into trouble...he was BORED!!

Back to this workout thing...The trainer measured me Wednesday, as it has been about 2 weeks since the last measurement, I've lsot 8 3/4 inches total! That brings me to around 30 inches so far lost. I am jsut not comfortable posting those measurements yet. I've also lost almost 3 lbs this week. I was aiming for 4, but it's better than nothing! Since I won't make it to the gym this morning, (nursery closes at 11) I will have to settle for a walk, or some weight resistance while Bailey naps. I try to go in the afternoon, and I just always seem to be doing something. It will be easier to work out next week since Jesse will be at school, and we won't be sleeping in! I've also been taking monthly pictures of myself to track my progress. Besides my "fat pants" getting to be too big, I can't notice a difference in myself. I feel the same flabby post baby thing. :( It's getting better little by little.

Maybe the NorthEast isn't so bad afterall...

I'm starting to miss our home in Connecticut. I never thought I would. Beside the fact that it gets frigid cold in New England, our house is in the midst of remodeling. Unfinished projects here and there can make for a sometimes messy house. Alas, I miss it!! I want to get home and finish what we started. It's going to take months of remodeling before we're done, and alot of money. Who knew remodeling a home cost so much!! I told Doug that we should just demolish and start over. :) Sounds good to me. Hopefully we'll be having new windows put in before winter. The kitchen was remodeled before he bought the house, but we now have different plans for it. haha! And I want a new refrigerator!! I found one I really like, but have no idea if it will fit until I go home and take measurements.

I really think the heat and humidity is getting to me. Being a Washington Native, I'm not used to this. I go outside and I'm instantly sweaty, and it doesn't drop below 100 degrees until after dark the last few days! It's makin' me cranky.

My baby weight loss efforts are coming along. I got the flu last week and didn't eat for a couple of days. So what happens when I don't eat for a whole day and I step on the scale? That's right, it went up!! So frusterating. I went to the gym yesterday after a whole week of not working out. It was nice, but man am I sore today. I was going to workout this morning, but I think I may just take a walk this evening. I hurt in all places. I took a class called "butts and guts" and it kicked my ass! I look foward to Thursday, it's Zumba!! By far the best exercise class out there. It doesn't even feel like an hour cardio workout.

I do get measured tomorrow so we'll see how many inches I've lost since last month. I'm down about 26" roughly since I started in June. I just wish the weight would come off as fast as the inches are. My "fat pants" are almost too big! I did go out to Express and buy some new jeans in a size smaller. So they don't fit yet, but its giving me something to work for. They are hot jeans! And when I say they don't fit, they just don't fit in the waist. They fit everywhere else. Terrible!! I still have that after baby pooch going on in my belly. I don't know how to get rid of it. But if I can remember right, I had the same thing with Jesse, and it just went away over time. You'd think at 7 months PP that it would be gone. Almost, but not quite!

It took me back....

Things have been crazy busy since Jesse got home a couple of weeks ago. I find that I don't get to sit down alot of days. Jesse came home on the 25th. He was the very last one off of the plane, as we expected. But, he got off the plane, and came up the back way with the Captain of the plane. LUCKY! haha. It was great to see him, and he's missing a front tooth.

In the days since he's been home, I've found he's lost all his manners, never had a bed time, and was given tons of sugar. WHY?! IT's been a little tough un-doing what someone else did. I'm not knocking John's parenting skills, but I think perhaps things should have been thought about a little more. I know it's hard to give your child a bed time when you don't see them for a year, but a child needs that structure.

Jesse was cleaning his room yesterday, which was a little shocking to me. So I went into his room, and we were talking. He told me he cleaned his room alot while at his dad's. So I said "oh why is that?" He then proceded to tell me, that his dad gets "mad" alot and he'd have to go to his room and shut the door so he didn't hear him yelling. That's pretty much all Jesse wanted to tell me. I'm not sure if he's blowing something out of proportion. I of all people knows how his dad gets "mad". Mad doesn't even begin to cover it. It worries me, and it took me back to when I was married.

We didn't get along. There was alot of emotional abuse. Name calling, screaming, holes in the wall type thing. I really hope and pray for the sake of my son, that it's not happening when he goes to visit. Jesse doesn't deserve something like that. So that leaves me with, What do I do? Nothing? Do I ask his dad? I mean, asking him is only going to provoke a fight and have him accuse me of trying to take Jesse away from him, or use him for money. Whatever. I really do lookout for what's in the best interest of Jesse. I don't want to take their relationship away. Jesse needs his dad, and he does love him, but when Jesse comes to me and tells me that his dad SCARES him. That scares me. And it only scares me because I know what I went through. I suppose only time will tell. For now, I'm stuck at a crossroad.

I just realized its been almost a month.

And I vowed to get in a least one entry a week. YEA RIGHT! haha. Staying home with Bailey and Jesse when he's not in school, plus going to school...makes for one busy mama.

We've just been doing the typical family thing...work, school, and playing on the weekends. Memorial weekend we headed to the waterpark to beat the heat. It was nice, and Jesse loved all the water slides. I'm glad he's finally coming out of his shell and trying new things. It took a long time to get him there!

We had a "date night" a couple of weeks ago and the whole night just started WRONG! haha. I was upset that we left late, then..there was a wreck and we got stuck in traffic, on our way back ( we had gone to a bar on the beach) I got car sick. Apparently texting in the dark after a few drinks will make one woosy. So our night ended short and we went home. I was sad because it's hardly ever just the "two" of us. I cherish the family we created, but also love the alone time we get and since it's so far and few inbetween I was upset that I got sick. ANYWAY, we made up for it and had another date night a few nights later. We went to see "Ghosts of Girlfriends Past." It was such a good movie, def. a chick flick, but even Doug liked it!

Bailey has become the expert at rolling over. She hates being on her tummy, so now that she's starting to do it in her sleep she wakes herself up. I'm thinking that she hates tummy time due to the mild reflux she has. I could be wrong though. She does however love going to the pool. We got her a little floatie, and she'd sit in the pool all day if you let her! Jesse also is becoming a great swimmer. 2 summers ago I couldn't get him in the pool hardly, and now he's diving in and doing flips! It's so awesome to see him grow and change in different ways like that.

He's leaving next week for TX for 6 weeks, and I'm a nervous wreck about the plane ride. I was stressing the importance of him not talking to strangers this morning. So he says: "But mom, what if a nice person wants to talk to me?" So I told him that just because they are nice doesn't mean you should talk to them. I told him just to be polite and tell them that he doesn't talk to strangers. and to find someone that works in the airport, or a police officer to help him. While we are paying the airline to have him escorted from the gate here to the gate in Dallas where his dad will be, I'm scared that somehting will go wrong. The flight attendent won't do her job. I know I'm being a paranoid mom. I've heard so many bad stories of kids flying assisted like this. I was really uneasy doing it, but it's really the only way. I hope and pray we have a good experience and everything goes how it's supposed to.

On another note, I've been in the gym during the week and seem to slack on the weekends. I think it's because that's the only time when everyone is home together. It's so nice to wake up on a saturday morning with no work or school ahead of us. I've also had a hard time following the eating plan the trainer has set for me. I do good some days and other days I slip and have a cookie, or some cheese. It seems silly and trivial, and I think its more of a fight with myself.

Bailey is going to be 6 months old in a few weeks. How time flies by. It seems like I was just in that hospital room in disbelief that I was really in labor. I had been in denial the whole morning because I wasn't in alot of pain. So I chalked it up to pre labor symptoms and went on with my morning, doing laundry, paying bills, dropping Jesse off at a play date. How perfect that worked out. When Doug and I arrived at the Dr.'s office that happens to be in a wing in the hospital, the midwife "checked" me for my weekly visit and said, "you're not going home" Doug and I looked at eachother and smiled, then cried. It was an intimate moment. The moment I looked at my huge belly and thought, today is finally the day I get to meet this little peanut who gets the hiccups everyday. She wasted no time either. 4 hours later she came flying out, the Dr. didn't even make it to my room. Bailey was delivered by a wonderful midwife and a couple of nurses. I was later told I should have made a documentary, and the delivery was the most textbook she's ever seen. I thanked everyone up above for looking down on us that day. It couldn't have went anymore perfect. Except the part where I begged for drugs, and the Dr. reminded me that I had not wanted any, and it was too late anyway. Now 6 short months later, she's cooing and talking, smiling, and eating like a champ. She's growing tons of blonde hair, and has 2 huge dimples. one on each side. She only lets me put her to bed, and gives me the biggest toothless grin every morning when she wakes up. I love being a mom..

Now that this entry is all over the place, I have to end it, since Bailey is screaming at me.